Trying to let you go
by niCkzeL-jb'ash
Summary: When you tried so hard to forget about someone so bad. Destiny will give you more reason to hold on. What choice will you make? Fight against destiny, or try to live with it? But living with it is giving you another chance of living your heartache again.
1. Chapter 1: He Leaves

OMG!.. you guys!. I was soo pissed since I already started making this like 3 hours ago and I'm about to finish it. But it just have to all go away! How freaking bad is that!.. Grr... really!.. I was typing and then everything went black and everything was gone... Grr.. I'm really pissed right now..

*breath* But anyways.. I decided to retype it all... As long as I can while I'm in the mood. So please, bare with me.

I don't own anything except for the plot and ideas.

xoxo..rizelle

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Chapter One: He Leaves.

It was weird.

I just can't seem to forget about him even though how hard I try. Even my brain won't allow it even for a second. It's hard to live with it. Knowing that all that chances that I can get was being given, but I still chose to break his heart. It's been what? 8 months? Oh, who Am I kidding? It's been exactly one year since it happened. But everything seems to be just like yesterday. And it hurts.

It was entirely my fault. I admit it. I even admit from the start. I hurt him, I broke his heart and there's no other way to put it. But things always happens for a reason. Am I stupid? I think I am. I still can't get over the fact that somehow, I have to move on. But destiny is pulling me apart. _He _is pulling me apart.

I wish I could take all the pain away. Not from me, but from him. He thought that he's the only who's hurting. He thought that I did the things that I've done just to hurt him. But he doesn't know that, the pain that he's feeling right now, is twice the sorrow that is killing me everyday.

Its killing me. I never meant to hurt him. I never intended anything to happen that way. I was trying to fight for the both us. I know it was cruel of me, because I didn't explain to him what's going on. But it's better for him not knowing what my reasons are. I was trying so hard to fight for the both of us, but fear got the best of me. And I hate myself for that. God knows that I still blame myself for everything. I was so cruel that I didn't notice that I'm hurting him too much.

It was the same for me though. Every time I think about it, I always end up being alone and confused. For some reason, I thought that this is what I deserved. After all, I hurt him. And I may never turn back time, but the pain and sorrow will never be back, 'cause it was never gone.

"Sharpay!"... That was my twin brother, Ryan. "For God sake!.. Get the hell up! It's 10 o'clock in the morning!"

"How many times do I have to tell you! Don't just barge in inside my room!. God!"... I shouted at him. It's been like this every morning between me and my brother. He wakes me up in the morning, I throw tantrums at him,and we make the world a better place. Or not!

"Still using the god's name in the process of shouting, I see".. Gabriella smirked. My brother's girlfriend and my best friend. They've been together for 4 years now. They started dating when we were in high school and everything starts to hit it off from there.

"Hey Baby!"

"Hi!".. Gabriella said softly before kissing my brother.

"OH my god! Please!.. You guys! This is the last thing that I really wanted to see right now. One of the reasons why I'm not a morning person!.. Please!.. Go make out in Ryan's room, not mine!".. I shouted, literally putting my hands over my eyes and not before throwing a pillow at them.

"Okay!"... Ryan said defeated. "But get up already! The boutique's supposed to be open 5 minutes ago."... Ryan said before walking out of my room.

"Sorry Shar!".. Gabriella giggled the follows Ryan.

Ugh! What a way to start my day huh?.. Gabriella and Ryan has been dating for 4 years and they seem to can't get enough of each other. Oh, curse you cupid for getting these two lovebirds together. I mean, I'm happy for them, really. At least my brother is having a blast of his love life. At least one of us is.

Ryan and I are leaving in this apartment now for quit sometime. 3 years to be exact. After we graduated from college, we decided to be independent. Get away under our parents' rules and roof, under any circumstances. So, we have our own place. Okay, maybe not that independent.

Our mom and dad can't even be more proud of us being independent, so they sponsored the place. Since my parents are known the be the richest people in town, they'd like to make a point. So, after telling them the whole plan, they insist of paying for the apartment and the things that's in it. It's way too big for me and my brother to say the least.

Let's see. We have three floors apartment. Contains 5 bedrooms. 2 at the ground floor and 3 at the second floor. All at the big size. The third floor was actually build for parties and celebrations. It's big space, terrace with a great view. A little bar in the side, but it's not like we're usually there, 'cause Ryan and I don't drink that much.

See, way too big for the both of us. But since our parents are the ones who made all of this happen, we can't argue. They want to call it as a "Congratulations Gift" as they put it.

Being part of being independent is having a job or a business of some sort. The one that Ryan is talking about earlier, the boutique. Yeah, it's mine. After I graduated, I've realized that I have to put up with something for a living. So, instead of finding a job, I've decided to have my own. The boutique is fairly enough to make a money for my everyday needs. Asides from Ryan, of course. My boutique contains of assorted things, different accessories that you'll surely need if you're a creative person like me. Flowers, figurines, angels and so much more. It's all in one, like other people wants to call it. I named it, "Crystals and Hazels".. Of course it was from me. Further explanations on how did I end up naming my boutique that name.

On other hand, Ryan has his own dance studio. Ever since high school, dancing is his passion. He's running the studio together with Gabriella. One of the things that they both love to do, is dancing. They met back in high school because of the dancing audition that was held back then for the theater. And it's amazing how these two gives dancing a credit on how they ended up being together.

Ryan and I are the only two people who lived in the gigantic apartment that our parents bought for us. We have a helper, her name is Patty. She does all the work in the apartment, cook foods, clean the place, does the laundry, water the plants and basically all the chores inside the house. But she never stays over and sleep there. She has her own family to go home to. So, she came in the morning around like 6 to make breakfast, and got off like 11 in the evening to go home. But not after making dinner and midnight snacks for me and Ry. Sometimes, for Gabby too. She usually sleeps over because god knows what they're doing inside Ryan's room!.. You didn't hear from me! But sometimes, Ryan sleeps over at Gabriella's when they just feel like it. But most of time, they're at home, 'cause for some reason, they don't want me to be left alone at home, and that's sweet.

Gabriella has her own place, not too far from us. She lives there alone, and it's big enough for her since she's the only one who stays there. After graduation, her mom got remarried again after a long time of being divorce with her dad. Her mom and her new husband-Gabby's step Dad- got transferred to Miami because of some business connection and they are to live there permanently. Her Mom ask her to go with them but Gabriella refused to. She said that she'd better stay here in Cali with us, and live her life just the way she wanted -with Ryan.

Her Mom agreed but not after telling her to visit them in Miami once in a while. Her parents both have new families right now, and she is very happy for the both of them.

Though, they never forget about Gabriella so that's good news.

Well, as for me and Ryan. We're still trying our best to work things out. I mean, being independent is a very big step, but hey. It's been 2 and half years and we've got this far.

"You're spacing out again."... Gabriella came into the kitchen. I already took a bath and change into something presentable and Hot if I may say so myself. "You wanna tell me what you're thinking?"...

"Nothing in particular."... I shook my head and put some coffee in my cup.

"I just wanted to tell you.."...Gabriella said after a while of silence. She sat across me.

I look at her and i know that look. "What is it?"... I asked her.

"I talked to _him_, last night."... She said. _Him._ It could only mean one thing. She continues, "He said that he's leaving for a vacation. You know, get away from all the drama for a while."

"Good for him.".. I nodded trying my best not to sound like my voice is cracking.

So, that's it. That's his way of making things alright? By leaving? _Leaving me!_ It was horrible to hear this. But I thought that maybe this is for the best, take a break not from the drama, but away from me.

"Shar..".. Gabriella started, trying to say another thing but I just can't take it anymore.

"Please don't.." I whispered and tried my best to cope with the situation and not cry. I started to gather all my things and stand up. "I'm gonna go. I have to open the boutique. I'll see you guys later."... I tried to smile and hug her.

How was it possible to feel all the pain all over again even though he's not there? It kills me to hear that he's leaving even just for a vacation. It's just a simpler way of telling me that he gives up. But I can't blame him. No one can. Because the only person to blame is me. I was the one who hurt him, I was the one who made him think that everything that we had was just nothing. And I was the one who chose to let him go.

But I have my reasons. Things happen for a reason and I'm still trying my best to believe that my reasons are enough to satisfy me that whatever I did to him was for the best. But it never did.

We're okay. No we used to be okay. But I don't know what happened. It just all came in way too fast that I didn't know that it's already happening.

We were never together. We're not official to say the least. We never actually tell each other that we're a girlfriend and boyfriend thing. But it's the only thing that's missing and we know it.

He courted me. I know what you're gonna say. Old fashioned, right? Isn't like the whole couple thing goes along with the process of the guy asking a girl out for a date, and then make up in front of the porch of the girls house at the end of the day and call it a night and them BAM! They're together. Like boyfriends and girlfriends. But, it never goes the same with me. Call me old fashion all you want, but that's how things are with me.

And I can't never be more than happy when he agreed to it and actually courted me. Bring flowers, chocolates, call me whenever he wants, takes me out for dinner and a whole lot more.

Everything was going great. And the only thing that's missing is the official word coming from me. It lasted for 5 months. But even though I didn't say anything for the moment yet, we we're practically together already. Picking me up when I asked him too, even sometimes when I don't. Spending countless night talking over the phone just because we feel like it or when he's one the who called just because he misses my voice.

And just right then, I know to myself that I love him. It was all a perfect way to start the year. Though we never really release the word to each other 'cause it's obvious that we're both scared of what's going to be the reaction of the other. But I so wanted to tell him that I do. I love him and he makes me happy no matter what mood I have. He always know what to say. Though he did tell me that. He told me he loves me. Over the phone, one time when we're talking late a night just because we feel like it. He thought that I was already asleep 'cause I've been silent for a long time. But, I'm just listening to his sweet voice and trying not to laugh when he's till talking and thought that I was sleeping. And then he said, he told me he love me and I wanted so bad to say it back, but I just got mesmerize.

After a short period of time, everything was already planned out. I planned everything out that I picture it to be so perfect. I was gonna say yes to him for us to be finally together. But then, things started to go down hill.

Fear got the best of me and I just have to end things from where they are. I remember all the things the he said to me. How broken he was and the look on his face. It was haunting me and I can't stop blaming myself for all of it. It was all my fault.

I still remember every single detail. Every time I close my eyes it's all coming back to me and haunting me.

Now, all that's left to me are the memories that we shared together, that we had together. From the very first time that I met him until the day when i chose to break his heart.

It was weird. I just can't seem to let any of it go.

_"Look, she doesn't have to go."... Ryan insisted._

_"Hey, I want to go!".. Sharpay butted in the conversation of her brother and his girlfriend._

_"See, she said herself, Ry! Just let her go!"... Gabriella pleaded._

_"Yeah, Ry! Just let her go!"... Sharpay mocked her best friend and look at her brother with puppy dog eyes._

_Ryan just rolled her eyes. "No! Gabby, I didn't even allow you to go."_

_"Oh Shut up Ryan! It's a just a girls night out!"... It's Sharpay's turn to roll her eyes._

_"No... It's a girls night out to begin with, but hook-ups are always the destination."... Ryan explained._

_"Oh please. Gabriella and I are both mature and responsible grown-up women. We can take care of ourselves. Besides, what makes you think she's gonna hook-up with someone? She already had enough of you!"... She smirked._

_"Sharpay!"... Ryan shouted._

_"I'm gonna be outside Gabs. Don't take a long."... And Sharpay is out of the door._

_Gabriella look back at his boyfriend and starts to sit on his lap. "Don't worry okay? Hook-ups are so out of the list for tonight."... She teased her boyfriend._

_"Hey!"... Ryan starts until Gabriella started to kiss his neck._

_"We're gonna be good girls, I promise."... _

_"Just make sure, Sharpay don't do anything stupid, okay?".. He said while caressing his girlfriends arm._

_She have to giggle to that. "Come on, Ry! She's your sister. Besides, she's with me. Trust me, she's in good hand."_

_"Hey, and same goes for you, Missy!"... He added._

_"Don't be ridiculous, Babe!"... She started kissing him. They probably so caught off in the moment that they started making out for 5 minutes._

_"PTTTTTTT!"... Sharpay repeatedly press the honk in her car to get their attention. "Come on, Gabriella! Stop playing tonsil-hockey with my brother! We have to go!"... She shouted._

_Gabriella pulls away and sighs. Sharpay can really be impatient sometimes. "Bye Baby!"... She kissed Ryan one more time fore running out the door._

_"Be good!"... He shouted after them,_

_At the party.._

_"It's crazy in here!"... Gabriella started shouting over the loud music that is blasting around the place while looking around trying to find their friends._

_Sharpay and Gabriella had pretty much grown popular in their years of high school. They made a lot of friends back then and they are really proud to say that it's not the one with plastic bimbos, but with a true friend. They had their own group back then. So, when they got a hold of each other, they decided to catch up and hang out again. This girls night out is really a big reunion for their group._

_"Look, there they are!"... Sharpay pointed to a group of four people in a table and started walking to them._

_The club is own by one of their friends. It's amazing that after all the hard work that they put up into it, it became famous and one of the clubs that is very in demand right now. After high school they all sure had their own way to go to._

_"Hey! You made it!"... Shiela greeted them. One of their good friends back in high school._

_"Wouldn't miss it for the world!"... Gabriella happily greeted her back and hug her._

_They all started to talk to each other and catch up. It really feels so good to finally be with them again._

_"Hey, where's Kim?"... Sharpay asked after a while._

_"Probably moping around and making sure that everything's in place"... Sam giggled. One of her true friends too._

_Right, Kim. Making sure that everything is in place. Why wouldn't she? After all, she owns the place. And Sharpay's really happy for all the successful business that she has right now._

_"I'm gonna go get something to drink!"... Sharpay shouted over the loud music and started heading in the bar._

_ She didn't get a drink right away when she reached the bar. She took this chance to look around and study the place. It's crowded. Way too crowded. There's a lot people who's dancing, already wasted and couples making out. _

_"Hey! What are you doing here?"..._

_"Kim!".. She turned around and hug her missing friend for a while. She's holding a glass of wine between her hands, she notice. But it's obvious that she's not wasted yet. _

_"The girls are over there!"... Kim stated pointing to their table._

_"I know!".. She nodded. "I'm just getting a drink!".. She shouted over the loud noise._

_"Whatever you want, say it. It's on the house!".. Kim smiled._

_"No, really. It's okay"... Sharpay insisted._

_"Oh, don't be ridiculous, Shar!... It's nothing!"_

_"Thanks!"_

_"And really, it's really nice to see you again!"... Kim said heartedly._

_"Everything's nice to you when you're not wasted!"... A guy butted in, in the conversation._

_Everything seems to stop around Sharpay. The music, the loud noise , the people dancing and the couples making out. Even Kim, her friend disappear. It's just him and her._

_Everything about him seems to be blue. His shirt that he's wearing. A baby blue shirt to be exact match him perfectly. It is a little fit for him, it's obvious that he wore that for his muscles to be visible, that musculine body!. And his eyes, his crystal blue eyes that is mesmerizing her, it's perfect. His messy yet sexy hair. The light brown colored hair that is a little bit longer for a guy's hair but somewhat perfect for him. Some of if are even covering his perfect blue eyes._

_"It's not like you know any better!".. Kim rolled her eyes to guy._

_"I do. That's why I don't show myself off when you started to get wasted.".. He guys smirked._

_Kim rolled her eyes one more time before finally deciding to get to the introduction part. "This is Shar. But you can't call her that! The name's Sharpay!"... _

_Blue meets brown and then it all stopped again for her._

_"Sharpay, this is my overly stupid cousin, Troy!"_

"Shar?"...

I looked up to see Cecille in front of me. I was at the boutique already and I space out again.

That weird flashback. Do I really have to see it all over again? It was the very first time that Troy And I met. In Kim's club when we decided a girls night. Just us girls. He happens to be her cousin too.

"You okay?.. Are we gonna open soon?"..Cecille asked. I suddenly look up around the place and realize that I didn't put the open sign yet. So much for having a good day.

"Ah, yeah!.. You can open now.".. I told her while I watch her change the sign from close to open. Cecille is one my helpers in the shop. I got two, actually, together with Susan.. I've found them two months after I started opening the boutique. And they've been pretty much a big help for me. The boutiques been build two years from now. It's amazing how long it already took.

"Where's Susan?"... I asked.

"Uhmmm... She can't make it today. She's sick. She have to stay home."

Susan and Cecille live together. They're friends so they basically go to work at the same time. I hire both of them so it's going to be easy to work with each other.

"You can pick up some flowers for her later. Tell her to get well soon."... I told her and she just nod and smiles...

I will probably space out again anytime soon. Seems like I've been doing that a lot lately.

The only thing that is bothering me right now is_ him_ leaving.

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Review!.. ^^..

This is actually based on true story but of course.. I've changed some of it to go with the character.

xox..rizelle


	2. Chapter 2: Bringing it up

So, yeah.. Basically! Same old, same old..

I don't own anything from the characters. Just the plot and ideas of the story.

So enjoy!

xoxo... rizelle

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Chapter 2: Bringing it up.

"I'm sure your Mom will love it!"... I smiled at a certain costumer while walking her out of the boutique.

"She will. She loves your flowers, Sharpay. She even ask me to come by and stop here today just to ask you if you have her favorite ones."... Stella smiled back as we stop in front of her car. She's a very nice person and a valid costumer too. It's great to know that someone is actually appreciating all the hard work after all.

"And I always have. Tell her I said hi!"...I close her car door for her after walking her out and watched her as she pulls her window down to take a last look at me.

"I will.".. She smiles. "And really, thanks for this."

"It's no problem. I'll see you soon!".. I waved at her and watched her get off he parking lot.

It is very hectic today, considering it's Saturday. A lot of people are coming in and out the boutique. And I can't even be more happy to say the least that business is going great and they love my products, especially the flowers.

Gabriella and Ryan called earlier saying that they have to leave the town to tour their students in different dance studio around America and watch theatrical interpretative dance. If I didn't know any better, I bet those two are just looking for an excuse to get out and be alone for a while.

Well anyway, their gonna be gone for 3 weeks top. They told me that they don't really want to leave me alone at home but they have to make something new for the dance studio. But, I'm fine with me. I mean come on, I'm a 21 year old grown up woman, I can take care of myself. Besides, I could really use some time alone for myself for a while and occupy my mind by working and do other stuffs.

After the news that Gabriella drop to me yesterday, I just can't seem to focus on anything at all. I keep messing up the list on where does the flowers have to be delivered, I had a hard time counting the exact change that the costumer should have, so Cecille took the counter for me while I try to relax and just entertain every single person who comes in the shop.

It's crazy. All this spacing out, all the flashbacks and all the memories. It's crazy.

How Am I gonna survive 3 whole weeks without freaking out because all of this? I mean, it's for the best that for the mean time, Gabriella and Ryan won't be around to see all this stupidity that I've been having for quite some time now. It seems like these past few days when I started to space out and be in my own little world, Gabby or Ryan is gonna show up and then know exactly what's going on and know what's the reason. Or precisely _who._

But then again, it would be good to be free from all the nagging that they do whenever they walk into the room.

Besides, Gabriella knows everything. From the slightest detail to the end. It was hard to keep things from her, and that means taking a risk of my brother knowing everything too. So they know what's been going on until now. It's one of the reasons why they don't want to leave me alone.

_Sharpay giggled as she once again type another word while being on her laptop, obviously occupied of what she's doing._

_"You guys are talking again?"... A very sleepy Ryan came into the room of his sister inviting himself in since the door was open._

_Sharpay looked at him for a while, not caring that her brother was appearing in her happy moment and not minding that he came into her room uninvited then continues to chat with someone on IM and be on her own world._

_Her brother gave her a weird look for a while before deciding to take a little look on what they're talking about. He quietly sits on her bed where he's behind her giving him a great view of her conversation on her laptop that is place on the bed side table._

_He crook his forehead while reading the message before reading it out loud. "I would rather be a policeman so I can lock you not inside bars but inside my heart 24/7?"_

_"Hey!"... Sharpay quickly took the laptop away from her brother and look at him like she's going to eat him_

_"Seriously Shar?"... Ryan started trying so hard not to laugh. "That was just so... Chessy!".. And then he let it go, he burst out laughing._

_Sharpay gave her brother a hard glare before turning her attention back to the screen but still talking to him. "Laugh all you want, but it's our thing.".. She suddenly look at him again before shouting. "And butt out!"._

_Ryan tries to calm himself but definitely having a hard time because of her sister's conversation. "So, did .. did he seriously say .. say that?"... And once again, bursting into a whole lot of laughter._

_She threw a big pillow that is laying behind her back to support her at her brother really hard that it made him lay down her bed when it hit him._

_"It's not like you and Gabriella never did it. You're actually throwing some cheesy lines on her while having sex!"... She smirked._

_"Okay, not is so uncalled for!"... Ryan quickly stood up and stare at her. "Gabriella and I like to keep those things between us."... He fixes his pajamas then start walking out of her room._

_"He Ry?."... Sharpay called after her brother._

_He turned around. "What?."_

_"I like your style, I like you class. But most of all I like your ass!"... Sharpay once again smirked with satisfaction while mocking her brother. "Though I don't wanna know how Gabriella likes your ass?"... She started to act like she's thinking and look over her brother._

_"Okay first! Since when did you start eavesdropping while we do it, and that was one time! And second, again! That was so uncalled for!"... Ryan finally delivered his last words to his sister before slamming the door to her room and headed to his own._

_"Goodnight!"... She shouted after him and giggled._

_It was always like that between the two siblings. They make fun of almost everything that they know about each other but never ended up in a bad page. They just get each other like that. So, it may seems that Ryan would be really pissed off right now, but he's not. He's not even half way there of being piss. Because, really, if you have a sister like Sharpay, you'd learn to live with it. He knows his sister too well and they'd been very open almost about everything. _

_And Ryan might have been a little bit guilty. Okay maybe not little 'cause that was definitely what they're doing. But come on, seriously! It's his sex life, not hers. Oh well, we're talking about Sharpay here, right?_

_Her phone started ringing and she pick it up quickly living her laptop on her table._

_"Hello?"_

_"Hey.".. It was him. _

_"Troy?.".. Oh yeah. That's definitely him. "Why are you calling me?. "... She crooked her forehead in confusion while trying to get her laptop from the table since she's already on her bed._

_"You stop responding. I got worried.".. Oh, how sweet! Right, he's the one the she's talking with online. And of course, they've been going through a lot of cheesy lines that one of his brother just read earlier, but she loves it. Oh believe me, she does._

_"Oh. I'm sorry. My brother came and you know, he started nagging and everything."... She said while trying to close the previews conversation that they had on Im and close her laptop. "Such a pain in the ass."... She mumbled._

_He chuckled. "Hey it's okay. I was just checking.".. It's obvious that he's smiling through the phone. "Oh, are you going to sleep now?.".. He asked later after noticing that had already signed out, sounds like he's disappointed and does the same._

_Sensing his disappointment, she giggled. "No silly!. What's the use of talking online if I'm already thrilled hearing your voice?."... She smiled and fully lay down on her king size bed._

_"That's good to hear." He whispers softly and struggle into his own bed sheet. "So, what do you wanna hear?"_

_It's an unspoken thing between them. Every time they ended up talking over the phone, they tell each other what the other wants to hear. Their one way of getting to know each other more. After the girls night out party where Sharpay met Troy, things from there went pretty well, like they just hit it off._

_They started being friends, go to dinner together, hang out with each other, talk online, and these; talk over the phone until they realize that they can't speak no more because of watery eyes and sleepy mood.  
_

_It's been a measure of good 2 months and everything went perfectly. I mean, they're not even together, or not yet but it's not an issue. Friendship always comes first, so if they're gonna be together, it's better that they started off as friends._

_".. Hmmm..".. Sharpay started to think aloud. "What do you want to tell me?."_

_"Well, that's new.".. He chuckled from the other line and started to think. "To be honest, I have tons to tell you.".. He sounded to start serious._

_"Something that you didn't tell me before?".._

_"Something that I wanted to bad to tell you, but I just can't find the perfect timing."... He sighs.  
_

_"Troy.."... Sharpay started but just got cut off._

_"Just let me speak.".. He suddenly says while waiting for the right moment, having the short silence between them as a harmony to listen to._

_This is very unusual for Sharpay. It's the first time that she heard him so serious, even over the phone and it sounds like he's really thinking deep. _

_It was obvious for the both of them that they like each other and they never denied it. But aside from hugging; which is more a friendly hug, there is no other action that has been done. Not even holding hands and definitely not kissing._

_But they wanted it to be perfect. In Sharpay's part, she have known Troy for shortly 2 months, and that's not enough time just to conclude that they should be together. But she never denied that she's really into him. And in Troy's part. It's been awhile since she had a girlfriend, and if this is what Sharpay wants, he's give it to her and he respects her every decisions. Though sometimes, he just really wanted to have her and kiss her and hold her anytime he wants. But like I said, they wanted everything to be perfect._

_"Troy?.".. Sharpay tried again after the long silence._

_"I wanted you so so bad... And it's driving me crazy already.".. He chuckled nervously and continues. "I know, you want to wait, and we're not even together. But Pay, I have to know if I stand a chance with you?"... He asked and it's obvious that he's sweating._

_She have to smile to that, and release her breath that she's been holding from the start. "Troy, you know you do."... Simple but yet very meaningful words._

_"I know.".. He said. "I just wanted to hear it from you."... He smiled from the other line._

My phone started to ring. Damn you memories for making me space out again!

"Talk to me.".. I answered my phone while I sit on the counter, trying to see what's on the news today.

"_Hey, we just landed to Angeles._"... Gabriella happily greeted me over the phone.

I have to smile to that, she sounded to happy but at the same time, it's obvious that she's missing me. That makes two of us. "Awww.. I'. missing you already. How was the weather there?"...

"_Freaking cold!_".. She giggled and I heard shuffles on the background.

_"So, how's my baby sister doing so far?"... _Figured. Ryan snatch the phone from Gabby. And how could he call me little, well, though he's older for two freaking minutes! He knows I hate it whenever he calls me that.

"I'm hanging up now."... I warn him for a start.

_"I'm kidding!"... _He said quickly after releasing a sigh the continues. "_God Shar, aren't you a little bit tired about this?."_

"I'm fine!".. I said ignoring his last comment. "Though I would much more preferred if you don't come back here anymore.".. I joke at him.

_"Don't worry, I'll bring lots and lots and lots of raisins when we get home."... _It was sarcastic, I can hear.

"I hate raisins!".. I rolled my eyes.

"_My point exactly!"... _Idiot!.

_"He's smirking!"..._Gabriella shouted in background. As if I didn't know already.

_"Gabriella! You're suppose to be on my side here?."_... Ryan started to gag at his girlfriend but I just heard her giggled.

These two can really drive me crazy sometimes. Okay scratch that, they make me crazy all the time. But when this moments come, it was kinda fun to actually go with it and forget the whole thing for a while.

"So, how's L.A.?."... I said a little while later.

_"Awesome!"... Gabriella was the one who's talking again on the phone. "The kids are all excited to start looking around the place. They can't even wait until tomorrow._

I giggled because it's obvious in her voice that she can't wait for it either.

_"Consider Gabby being one of those kids!".. _Ryan shouted. See what I mean.

_"Shut up, Babe!"... _They'll probably kill each other later. Or not. "_Anyways..."..._She continues. _"How's the boutique goin'?"..._ Oh please, I probably know where this conversation will lead too. Knowing her too much just scares me whenever she asks about something that's just out of the blue.

"It's doing great!"... I predicted this. "Oh, and look at that! Another costumer!"... I said even though the store is obviously clear from any people. "I gotta go, talk to you guys later!, Bye!"... I excused.

_"But Shar-.."_ I cut her before she said anything and hang up the phone. I've realized that, the more I talk to Gabby, the more chances that she'll bring everything up. And that's the last thing that I needed right now. So, thank you god! For making her disappear even just for 3 weeks.

When I looked up, I noticed Cecille looking at me confused.

"What?."... I asked her.

"But we don't have any costumers around."... She said, obviously listening to my previous conversation with Gabriella.

I just rolled my eyes and starts checking the stocks on the room. Sometimes these people just really need to mind their own business and just leave mine for a while.

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Wooohhhhh!

What an exhausting day!..

Anyways.. review please..

xoxo..rizelle.. ^^


	3. Chapter 3: What's terrible?

Okay, so i don't really know if i'm gonna try and continue doing this one aside from my other story.. But since this one is kinda base on a true story.. Maybe i'll give it a shot.

If i'm going to have a lot more time, i'll probably post the next one soon.. I hope you like this one..

I don't own anything..

.. xoxo.. rizelle

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"I don't get it. How come every time I try to spend some time with you. You always have a way to let me down?".. Taylor asked while she's walking with me.

Taylor is one of my best friends. We practically grew up together, had the same school since kindergarten and shares class all throughout. But Gabby grew much closer to me because of the fact that she's dating my brother and she's practically around 24/7.

"It's new york, Shar! Live a little. There are a lot of great places out here to shop. Please, don't let me down on this one. It's not every day that I get a chance to actually fly in here just to see you."

"Oh please, don't put this one on me. You're here for a business trip.".. I said while walking into Starbucks. It's 8 o'clock on Tuesday morning. I'm on my way to the boutique when Taylor called me and let me know that she's in town. She's basically a traveler. Because of her work, she was always destined to move from places to places just to give her a good measure of her job.

And it's exactly 4days of being alone, Gabby and Ry calls once in a while, telling me how they're doing and frankly, I could say that they are definitely having a good time. But for me, not so much.

"Details. Details..".. She mumbled and sit with me when we finally found a place to sit in.

"I'm sorry, Tay. But business is hectic right now. I have a boutique, you have a job. We're not teenagers anymore. We don't own our time anymore.".. I explained to her while we wait for the right time to order.

"Okay, honestly. Gabby called me. And she told me stop by and see how you we're doing. Though I'm really going to stop by, but not in another two days."...

"Thanks, Tay!.. That's really sweet of you!".. I said sarcastically and stood up to get something to drink. "What you want?".

"Surprise me."... She sigh and leaned onto the chair and start texting. Probably something about business.

_"Okay, would you rather, miss out on a date with Meagan Fox, or spend your whole day eating shrimps".. Sharpay smirked._

_"Hmmm.. okay, honestly, I don't know what to choose. First, I hate to miss out on a date with Meagan Fox and seriously, Pay?.. Shrimps? You wanted me dead?.. Not only I hate shrimps, I'm allergic to them.".. Troy flops on the bed beside her and make himself comfortable by putting his one arm around her tiny waist._

_"And you wonder why you hate them?".. Sharpay thinks loudly before turning to him again. "Come on, I wanna hear. You have to choose."_

_"Of course, you wanna hear.".. He mumbled before cornering her on the bed by simply pulling her close to him and putting the other arm around her not removing the other._

_"Troy!".. Sharpay squeled but loving the feeling. "So, what would it be, Mister?"_

_"I'll make it simpler for you.".. He whispered into her ear and leaning closer to her if possible. "Would you rather go on a date with Robert Pattinson, or me?".. He smirked._

_"You're right. It is simple.".. Sharpay said slightly teasing him by leaning away from him a bit but him not allowing it. "Probably, Edward. Oh, wait did I say Edward? I mean, Robert Pattinson. One hell of a guy. I wouldn't trade anything for it."_

_"Liar.".. He mumbled before kissing her. It started out to be plane innocent kiss, but the longer it took, the more passionate it become._

_"Troy..".. Sharpay whispered before pulling slightly away from him._

_"I know. I know. I'm sorry.".. Troy said understanding her side but keeping his forehead attach to her and looking directly into her eyes. "It's all about taking things slow, right?".. He added._

_She nodded. Somehow, she really wanted it to happen. But it's just too soon for the both of them._

_"So, would you rather miss out on a date with Meagan Fox, or spend the whole day eating shrimps?".. Sharpays aid seriously and looking directly at him._

_Troy simply chuckled. Even in a situation like this, she never fails to humor him. One of the things he really loves about her._

"... and then, we can go around for shopping? What do you think?".. Taylor asked me but I never really understand the conversation at first.

Not again! I swear, it'll take another minute before I'll finally lose myself. How could I let this thing slip into my mind every now and then? No wonder I'm having a hard to let it go. I'm not even encouraging myself to do it in the first place. All the things, the memories that have something to with him, seem to be staying than drifting away. I'm not even sure if it is for good or bad, and honestly, I don't wanna know.

"Shar?.. Shar!"... Taylor shouted a little, not fully getting the attention of all the people around, but enough to get mine.

"Huh?"... I looked at her. And then she sighed.

"Do you wanna go? Or you wanna rest? You could use some nap time if you want. You look so stressed at the moment.".. Taylor looked at me worriedly. I know, she knows what's been going on. But the good thing about Taylor, She knows exactly when to shut up. She knows that I don't want to talk about it right now, so why brag about it?

"Thanks Tay. ".. I looked at her and smiled. "Really, thank you. But I have to get to boutique in an hour. I have a lot of things to work on to. But tell you what. How's tomorrow sound?"

"If you're referring to something that got something to do with bed, hot cocoa, a very warm blanket and a bunch of DVDs to watch? Then yes! A thousand times yes!.. Tomorrow's perfect!".. Finally!.. I thought.

"Great!.. I'll see you then. At the apartment, okay? You know where it is." .. I told her and she smiled. She hugged me and then pull away,

"Wouldn't forget where it is. "She said and we finally separate ways.

Taylor is a busy woman. And so am I. Though, there are a lot of things that I'm busy about aside from work. Daydreaming?.. Uhmm.. yeah.. You can call it that.

"_I'm leaving."... Troy simply said, trying to hide the sadness in his voice but having a very hard time to. _

_They were talking over the phone, it's been exactly 2weeks since the last time they saw each other and they are missing each other terribly. Well, yeah they talk and texted like all the time, but being with each other's arms literally is different. And now, when she heard it from him again, he's gonna tell her that he's leaving?_

"_What do you mean, you're leaving?"... Sharpay asked, trying to process the information that she just heard._

"_I don't really want to worry you, Shar"… Troy sighed. It's obvious that he's having a hard time telling her. "I mean, it's not permanently, you know. My dad wants me to spend vacation in Singapore for god knows how long. You know how he gets. Since, I don't want to work for him; he thought that maybe opportunities are hanging around the Country."_

_Troy's dad.. *sighs* Troy's dad. Troy always tells Sharpay that his dad wanted him to work for him after college. This was like months ago since he graduated first in class after he took a vocational course much to his likings this time. And since, they have their own company; Troy's dad was kinda expecting him to take the place when the right time comes. But Troy, being the independent kind of person, wants to stand on his own feet, find his own job not related to his or their company and make something from his own. And unfortunately, Dad is not very fund of the idea itself; so in short, he's making his life a living hell for him._

"_And you agree to this?"… Sharpay asked as calm as possible. She doesn't want to blow off on him. Because if he's really leaving, she don't want to say goodbye in wrong terms._

"_I don't actually have a say to this."... Troy sighed nth time. "He already planned the whole thing before telling me. Tickets, place to stay, possible places that I can work, everything!" … Sharpay stay silent for a minute or two, not really knowing what to say. So he decided to continue. "Believe me, I don't wanna go, 'Cause I really don't. But you know that this is the chance to actually prove something to my dad so he can finally butt out in my business. He's been pushing me too hard these couple of months and it's driving me crazy already. So, if this is what he wants, then fine!.. I'll find something in Singapore, and I'm gonna make sure, that I can stand on my own._

"_Okay.".. Sharpay finally whispered. "I know that you really want to do something that can prove your dad that you can work anywhere, do anything without his help. And I trust you. I believe you can. "… Now its Troy's time to be tongue tied. He has a feeling that she still has things to say, and she continued. "And who Am I to stop you from doing anything, right?"…_

"_Shar… " Troy started but Sharpay cut him off._

"_Besides, I know we don't know how long it's gonna last till you get back but like you said, it's not permanently, you're gonna be back."_

"_Of course I will. And nothing's gonna change, okay? What we do, what we are? All of this. Nothing's gonna change. "… Troy tried to bring comfort to her which is slowly seems to be working,_

"_Okay. "… She echoed her answer earlier and in a whisper._

"_And just so you know. You are something to me. Why do you think I'm telling you this 5minutes after found out about it?"… Troy asked her but not waiting for an answer. "You know what I feel for you, and if I'll have it my way, it's either I'll ask you to come with me,".. he paused for a while giving her the chance to react._

"_Troy, you know I can't." … Sharpay finally answered. _

"_That… or a word coming from you. Telling me that you don't me to go. I won't. "… Troy said. Sharpay, having a hard time to say anything, taking single by single details processed into her brain._

"_Even if I don't want you go, I won't ask you that. I know what you have to do, Troy. And I'm not going to be selfish and ask you stay, even if I so, so want to, badly. "… Sharpay said._

"_I just want you to see where you stand in my life. It doesn't matter what other people say. What's important to me is you and what you say. That if ever you don't want me to go, just say it. I'll rip the ticket off. Right here, right now. "… Troy seriously told her._

"_Okay, okay. You'd proved your point. I understand already.".. Sharpay had to smile to that._

"_Good. Because I don't want you to ever think that you don't have any right to be part of my life, or be my life. "… Troy's definitely sick of Sharpay always thinking that she's just a nobody to tell him what to do._

"_When are you going to leave?"… Sharpay finally asked after a couple a silence between them. Probably wanting to ask that question since the beginning of the conversation._

_Troy finally, once again sighed. "In two days. "_

What's more terrible exactly? The fact that you let go of someone that you actually never had? Or trying to believe that, even though how much you wanted to be with someone, it scares you to take a risk even for once in your life.

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REVIEW!.. please!.. ^^


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